Sunday, October 12, 2008

wish you were here...

its really dry and dusty now. i know everyone's talking about reluctant memsahib at and val over ....and mercury's doing funky things out there according to tam at ...stay home, she advises, detox and don't get on your hosses until, what, the 15th or something? don't panic. that's the main thing, so says lulu at the riotous and blisteringly real ...but i think she was talking about our crashing global economy which makes people panic and jump out of tall buildings and also makes people steal from other people. look what happened to miranda over at . never steal from her. she'll break your bloody fingers man. as reya says (have to add this just now because i can't remember exactly), she think it might have to do with someone called Mr George Fuck It Up Well And Truly Bush.
well. i am holding a particular planet alignment responsible. i can only wonder what dear mr god is thinking about all of this. what silly little joke is he playing? maybe its mrs god. more up her street. to get us back for what we did to that spoilt little revolutionary son of hers...(
ernest will end up like dylan: and become a prophet by mistake.
oh i wish it would rain. the earth is cracking up everywhere. like the cement floor in my house. (bastard builders. mean little builders.). and the wind blows and blows and blows ageing me at a rate of knots, and toying with my mental health, like it's a football or something. like it was the yellow plastic bag i watched this morning, being twirled slowly round and round the courtyard, like a tumble weed..this afternoon there was thunder on the mountain and dark clouds...but of course, they never quite made it out to the splendid ngorobobs. oh no. not to these bald little wind scoured hills. clouds are far too opulent for them.
i might be forced to consult a rain maker. and pay my karmic dividends pronto.

rubin rode with me this morning. two hours over the bare baked plains. the sky was white. and faint church chorals tumbled their way in bits and bobs on wind spirals. distant. beautiful.
i didn't wish to be anywhere else.

now i do.
this evening i deeply wish i was in the ritz in paris in a white toweling dressing gown, sipping prosecco (tick this box: prosecco in hand) with a pile of magazines, dinner delivered, movies all ready to go, an enormous silken bed, with endless oodles of cash waiting to be spent on wonderfully frivolous things like silver or red or pale tan or gold suede high heel shoes, with silk ribbon ties, lotions and potions and perfumes which will take away african sun wrinkles in a jiffy and make one smell of crisp linen and plump roses, hair is all jen (as in arniston - lots of it) pure white linen riding shirts smelling of lavender, new jodphurs and boots all of which have been exquisitely hand crafted only for me. underwear underwear underwear which fits properly and enhances... brown and kingfished blue and plain white cottons...all wrapped in boxes and ribbons. and oh hell. throw in some delicious caroline rummegar jewelry. why not? and three little gold rings of uneven diameter.
uuuuuum...what else? oh definitely a foot massage, chocolate, great sodding piles of letters from everyone i know saying how bloody fantastic they think i am and last, but not least, three of the worlds top record companies , going crazy in the hotel lobby to get me signed up after the single witchcraft changed the history of the world.
oh and dido's my manager.
and then of course, when i've had enough of life this way, a private jet, all paid for, picks me up and whizzes me home to my little battered pink house on the hill, with four horses, four dogs, 5 cats, three children who happen to be three of the most beautiful people on the entire planet, and one ever patient, ever loving, ever handsome, ever absent husband.

put that in your pipe and smoke it mr universe.

No kitchen board tonight because damian has my camera. he borrowed it to go and take photographs of camels.

camels? CAMELS?


Janelle said...

and before anyone says it mr OR MRS universe...wasn;t there a goddess before the christians? janelle

Ernest de Cugnac said...

well you beat me to it, but I was next. Loved your fantasy - nothing like being wrapped in a copious white toweling dressing gown is there? I'm sure Mrs G would wish you rain; the poor soul is just so distracted at the mo. And she thanks you for the mention. Bis.

Fat, frumpy and fifty... said...

over from Family affairs. will come back soon to read previous posts....enjoying you so far!!

Reya Mellicker said...

There has always been a goddess - lots of 'em actually.

Where is the rain? Why is it holding back? Have you tried singing to the rain? If you sang, and I was the rain god, I would immediately say "yes ma'am" and deliver a nice slow soaking rain to replenish everything.

Or a rain dance? I tried that a couple of years ago when we were having a terrible drought. I don't know if it worked but it kept me busy while I was waiting.

Wish I was in Paris, too, same hotel. After the foot massage, shall we meet in the bar for a drink?

Lori ann said...

I want to come too! we are dry and have too much wind, needing rain, but not as bad as you i am sure. Am sending thoughts of big juicy raindrops to the little pink house on the hill. right. now.

xx lori

Mud in the City said...

Here in cloudy, chilly London the heat and heart of Africa seem so far away. But your blissful descriptions do bring them all that bit closer! Thanks.

Eliza said...

Babe, i have just been in the company of camels, loads of them; and dancing Arabian horses, and whirling dervishes, and sumptuous feasts out in the desert with copious amounts of wine, and a floating hotel on the Nile. It was truly one of the most amazing experiences of my life, can't wait to tell you about it!!! And the red dress and bare feet went down a treat :)

Irene said...

Thank you for all the great links. I added them to my blog list. I love African stories. I love Africa.

Janelle said...

hey ernest..well. the alternative to white towel robe in the ritz is a pure silk one in bali or something....! thanks for visiting xx j
fat and frumpy - thanks for visiting! xx j
hi reya! nope. think i must just be patient for the rain...its starting to build up on the mountains...but its the wind. the wind! xx j
lori ann and mud indeed! blow some rain our way...! XX
eliza my god babes! sounds FANTASTIC! lets meet SOON so i can see the pix and hear all about it, you perfectly glamorous woman you...xx j
its a pleasure irene and hope you enjoy all the great reads! xx j

Miranda said...

Hey, dry dust in our eyes but did you see the storm over Mt Meru yesterday? And thunder? And this morning she had snow on top. But down here where angels fear to tread still dry dry dust dust. Thought I'd get blown off with a bunch of cardboard boxes in rehearsal today. Aish this weather - beats me.

Maybe I come kesho to hear your new SONG!! CAn't wait!

family affairs said...

Shall we meet in Paris? Lx I have just done a little rain dance for you and sent it through the ether xx

Jocelyn said...

Your little wishlist to the Universe? I have the same thoughts in my head...but because it's been too damn wet and sodden here--such a swampy fall every which way.

You've reminded me I prefer wet over dry.

But I'll still meet you in Paris for shoe shopping.

lars shalom said...

ha lord of the universe, enjoy!!

Chimera said...

What is the Joni Mitchelle song you remind me of? Only she wanted a grand piano in her silky hotel room and I would prefer a massause.
Lovely pre rain, soft focused dry witted post! (I miss the rains so much. Although not the torrid wait when you can smell it in the air and it's still not breaking overhead everyone goes a little nuts..ahh.
T xx
p.s. love the picture of the starry night feet.

Janelle said...

momo! it was lovely to see you yesterday you crazy girl!XX
thanks lulu! keep dancing baby! XX jocelyn - see you in jimmy choo paris! HAH! X
thanks for popping by lars! x
hey tanvi! ouf! not sure which song that was..have you remembered? yeah its a sweet picture of madam gabby's feet...xx j

Bill Stankus said...

nice thoughts and words
really enjoyed the photos

Val said...

your song about 'soon it will rain..' keeps blowing through my head - it will it will.... love the escapist fantasy xx