Tuesday, January 12, 2010

spun out. . .


it's tuesday. but it feels like sunday.
i have the same feeling. whoever heard of the tuesday blues?
me neither.

this feeling is not a dancing one. i wish it was. i wish it was. perhaps it's just the usual case of PPD's (post piss up depression). too much chocolate box. (this is a fine fine wine oh best beloveds. no headache in the morning. it's marvelously miraculous)
it's like an "i want my mummy" feeling. i'm 40 something for godsakes....

i'm already back at school. but at least we had a day off....the 12th of jan is a public holiday in tanzania because of Zanzibar Revolution Day, the day when lots of arabs were rounded up and killed by the revolutionaries of the African Sharazi Party. literally herded into the sea one fine day. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zanzibar_Revolution. if you're faintly interested, there is some alarming footage of this event, which happened on the 12th of January, 1964 - not that long ago - in a film called Africa Adieu, a deeply disturbing documentary. it's best watched in italian with english sub titles.

so thanks to this terrible day, we get a tuesday off. god is great. and works in the weirdest ways. tricky tricky little god.

life on the hill is sweet and green and smudgy. i still haven't quite settled back in with authority. with alacrity. with entire presence. the holidays snatched this quite away. i'm stunned rather. something in the air knows. the weather is being perfectly seductive. the views are trying their best to convince me that this is where i should be. little magics twirl on the rain wind, tugging at me. you see, i wanted to tell you about this:



and this:

and this:

but i am speechless. so these will have to do for now.
until i find my feet and my words again.
so, until then, toodely old toot, oh bestests, X.X.X truly madly deeply. x j































14 comments:

Bill Stankus said...

You do know I look forward to your tidbits ... always a small peek into a person, place and time I find tantalizingly interesting.

It doesn't 'help' that I'm also listening to Rachmaninov's Piano Concerto No.2 In C Minor, Op.18: 2. played by Vladimir Ashkenazy while reading your post.

Keep on keeping on.
B.

Eleonora said...

No no no... you HAVE to tell me more of that first of 3 photos. You must.

Lovely post as always, Janelle. And as always I am dreaming of where you are wishing I was there too.

Eleonora (Lola) xx

Reya Mellicker said...

That Gabriella is truly something, she radiates an otherworldly worldliness in every picture of her I've ever seen. wow.

Glad you're home and interested to hear that you still feel the apres holiday paralysis. I always thought it had to do with cold weather, but apparently raising all that energy, to get through the solstice, wipes us all out. Crazy.

Settle in at will. Welcome home.

Lori ann said...

amazing photos,
perhaps you ought to just follow your dancing child and twirl right out that door, then the feelings will follow...
sending lots of sandyseasprayed love.

Mud in the City said...

Lovely. And Beautiful. And twirly swirly somehow.

Laughter and zen vibes being sent your way.
x

Val said...

love the energy of your blog - those photos - and posts - even when you are feeling ppd they fizzle and pop like a sherbert fountain - open that chocolate box!! xx

karen said...

Great photos - and hope those tuesday-blues have well and truly evaporated by now?!

Janelle said...

thanks y'all for swingin' by..
feeling slightly more "normal". not sure that's ok either!? cor. hard to please eh? love all round. X j

family affairs said...

Big hugs and wish I could magic back your mummy Lxx

ewix said...

Tuesday blues sound quite possible to me
yes, we are always going round celebrating the most weird stuff
life can be very strange indeed.........

Nancy said...

The pictures are great, especially the last one with the moon. wow. I'm feeling the same way. Just can't seem to feel right... Maybe it's world happenings that make us seem "unsettled." There are certainly plenty of those.

connie said...

Your posts are just wonderful - your evocation of not only your day, but the feelings of your day move me.

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